Archive for the ‘Comedy’ Category.

The Doctor Will See You Now

$5 for the first 5 minutes. “Stop it!”

Just stop it!

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Obamacare Downfall

So, if I follow correctly, the smartest president ever is not smart enough to ensure that his website works; he’s not smart enough to inquire of others as to whether his website works; he’s not smart enough to check that his website works before he goes out and tells people what a great website experience they’re in for. But he is smart enough to know that he’s not stupid enough to go around bragging about how well it works if he’d already been informed that it doesn’t work. So he’s smart enough to know that if he’d known what he didn’t know he’d know enough not to let it be known that he knew nothing. The country’s in the very best of hands.

Thus Spake Obama: The incompetence of our neo-monarchy

Forward!

Bonus video:

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President Pantless and Bombing Random Countries

America’s selective outrage is not lost on the world.

The U.S. Must Not Be The World’s Policeman

No act of Congress can buy Obama any kind of credibility and no amount of bombs will put the mom jeans back on the naked emperor. It’s too late for that.

The recurring argument that Iran is watching Syria and that its nuclear program hangs in the balance is hot air.

Iran knows that Obama isn’t trying to bomb Syria because he really believes that WMD use is a red line. Its leaders know that the proposed attacks, like the arms being supplied to the rebels, are part of Obama’s support for the Sunni opposition at the behest of the Sunni oil states who have a death grip on Washington.

The message from the attacks won’t be that America takes human rights atrocities seriously. Sudan, Rwanda and countless other genocides make a mockery of that. The message will be that the Saudis can still call in the United States Air Force and Navy to clear the way for their regional objectives.
. . .
Obama’s political palace corps still insists on selling Americans on the myth of his competence. That is the confidence trick they want to pull off with the help of Congress. It is a trick that will not be played on Assad or Putin or the rest of the world, instead it will once again be played on the American people.

The Case of Obama’s Missing Pants

Pantless Pete, Pantless Obama

A joke son, a joke.

In an essay for the NYT Sam Tannehaus argues that President Obama “holds office at a time when the presidency itself has ceded much of its power and authority to Congress.” No, really. This is what he says. It is, frankly, a rather bizarre claim.

A Hands-Tied Presidency?

Hey, let’s bomb a random country!

A few years ago–I think this was at Division of Labour–I asked readers to go to RandomCountry.com, spin for a Random country, and then make the case for war with that country. With the prospect of military adventures in Syria on the horizon, it’s a good time to play again! So here’s how you play.

1. Spin for a Random Country.

2. If you already know a lot about that country, explain why we should bomb it.

3. If you don’t already know a lot about that country, read the country’s Wikipedia page and CIA World Factbook page. Then explain why we should bomb it

Why Should We Go To War With [Name]?

Over at Buzzfeed, John Ekdahl has a must-read article up about “14 Principled Anti-War Celebrities We Fear May Have Been Kidnapped.” Where, he asks, are the Sheryl Crows, Bruce Springsteens, Sean Penns, George Clooneys, Janeane Garofalo, and Barbra Streisands of the world who were never shy about voicing super-patriotic dissent against Bushitler’s war machine?

Has There Been a Rapture of Anti-War Celebrities? If Not, Where The Hell Are They?

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“Women in politics.”

Women, on the other hand, do almost everything better.

David Weidner

I’d kicked the sext-crazed man around enough, and Nuzzi was such an unsubtle attention whore, so the best thing to blog is nothing. But that was yesterday.

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Ring Bell for Psychic

RingBellforPsychicNY1207

“A North Hollywood woman has filed suit against her psychic reader, claiming the medium fraudulently took her $11,000 without lifting a curse on the plaintiff’s love life.”

“Psychic sued for failing to lift love curse”

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Best Degree Programs

Best Degree Programs. Or is it BestDegreePrograms?

Ah, the ego validation that blawgers so crave. The email just arrived, informing me that SJ has been selected as one of the Top 30 Law Blogs of 2013! Woo hoo!!! I want to thank the Academy…oh, wait. It’s not from the Academy. Not the Pulitzers. Not even the ABA Journal.

It’s from Best Degree Programs dot org, that deeply meaningful website that sends out the weekly inane infographics because they love us blawgers so very much and want to help us. Just please, please, include the backlink. But the infographic scam can only work so many times before the flawgers figure out that it’s really not a matter of deep appreciation, but just your basic backlink scam.

You’re The Ginchiest (and other lame linkbait)

Worth reading through to the end.

Oh, and TANSTAAFL.

Ozymandias

Unfortunately, it seems that the future Aldous Huxley predicted in 1932, in Brave New World, is arriving early. Mockery, truculence, and minimalist living are best, then enjoy the decline. However, we do need a Revolving Door Tax (RDT), learn what Members of Congress pay in taxes, and prosecute politicians and staff and their “family and friends” who profit from insider trading.

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How Not To Respond to Criticism

“To truly see the diversity of the human race is sometimes frightening….”
Tyler Cowen

We now present a masterclass in how a business owner should not respond to criticism.

The Folks at Amy’s Baking Company In Scottsdale Have Gone Insane


Part 2

It appears that the owners of Amy’s Baking Company in Arizona expected an appearance on celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay’s “Kitchen Nightmares” program to vindicate them. They believed that they serve quality food, that they have been unfairly slandered by the entire Internet. Maybe they had never seen the reality program, which features last-ditch efforts to save failing restaurants run by people who are delusional or incompetent…and frequently both.

How Not To React To Internet Criticism: The Epic Facebook Meltdown Of Amy’s Baking Company


Part 1

Perhaps that it’s beyond a bad idea to accuse an unhappy customer of working for the competition, and then call him/her “ugly,” a “loser,” and a “moron.”

Ouch! Today’s Hard Lesson on Yelp

Yelpers went nuts over the weekend — and guess who was the topic? Amy Bouzaglo of Amy’s Baking Company in Scottsdale, who apparently cooked up a storm on Saturday.

In fact, I reached out to one diner who was at Saturday night’s taping of Kitchen Nightmares at Amy’s. He got a very real dose of reality television — more than he bargained for, actually.

Screaming, Expletives, and, Eventually, Police: All in the First Night of Kitchen Nightmares Taping at Amy’s Baking Company

Wow. Just wow.

Amy’s Baking Company [Yelp]

Get popcorn:

Ozymandias

Unfortunately, it seems that the future Aldous Huxley predicted in 1932, in Brave New World, is arriving early. Mockery, truculence, and minimalist living are best, then enjoy the decline. However, we do need a Revolving Door Tax (RDT), learn what Members of Congress pay in taxes, and prosecute politicians and staff and their “family and friends” who profit from insider trading.

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Why Government Matters

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Stop that! Rémi Gaillard

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“alarmingly high” and Dinner Whores

“The amount of men who think they’re Ryan Gosling in New York City is alarmingly high,” [New York fashion blogger Brittny] Pierre noted.

I was a ‘dinner whore’: Confessions of a fashionista who cruised Craigslist and OKCupid for dates just so she could get free meals

The corollary is that the number of women who think they’re Carrie Bradshaw in New York City is alarmingly high.

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